My family!
It has been a wonderful (and difficult) week!
I'll start with the difficult so I can end on a high note. We finally stopped by Susannah's on Friday night (she lives with her cousin Beatrice who is a member) and I knew it was going to be bad. I've been dreading it. She completely ignored us when we walked in and she left the room. First punch to the gut. We ended up talking with Beatrice some more and she explained how she's been trying to reason with Susannah about baptisms for the dead and all of the confusion and is having no luck. We read some of the Book of Mormon with Beatrice at her request and made plans to come back for lunch on Saturday. She really wants us to know we're still welcome in her home. As we were about to leave, Susannah came back downstairs and handed me all of the material we've ever given her. Holy second punch to the gut, Batman. Beatrice told us to give her the material and then they started arguing. It was horrible. Sister Crane and I were caught in the middle of it watching helplessly and we finally left when they took a breath.
We ran into President Fairbank as we were walking to the car and I think he could see the tears welling up in my eyes. We told him what had happened and he told us we've done everything we can and it's not our fault. We came home and I was trying to hold back tears and then Sister Crane made me hug her. #gameover She just let me sob it out while she hugged me and then I finished a carton of Ben & Jerry's with some brownies mixed in.
I hate Satan.
But I felt so upheld. It was a transformative experience for me to have in understanding the enabling and strengthening power of the Atonement. Despite feeling so heartbroken, it was like I knew I should be feeling heavier and more devastated, but the underlying current of the Spirit was there comforting me and softening the blow and taking part of the pain. It was incredible. I mean, Ben & Jerry's and Sister Crane helped, but there was something so powerful and eternal about how I felt. The Spirit was there helping me to understand that it was not the end and helping me to have a more eternal perspective about it.
And President Fairbank sent us the kindest text telling us we were doing a fantastic job. He is quite possibly the best Branch President this church has ever seen.
I also felt comforted as I found answers in the Book of Mormon the very next morning. Alma 29: 5,8 "Yea, and I know that good and evil have come before all men; he that knoweth not good from evil is blameless... For behold, the Lord doth grant unto all nations, of their own nation and tongue, to teach his word, yea, in wisdom, all that he seeth fit that they should have; therefore we see that the Lord doth counsel in wisdom, according to that which is just and true." I know that Susannah will not be held accountable for what she does not fully understand right now. There are so many cultural and language barriers working against her (she can't even read the Book of Mormon and gain a testimony there) and I know that it will all be made right. She will have the opportunity to fully understand the gospel before she makes a final choice, whether that's here or the next life. God will make sure that she has "all that he seeth fit that [she] should have". Our Heavenly Father is so perfectly just and so perfectly merciful. How grateful I am for that knowledge.
Phew! Sorry the sad story has taken most of the email. In other news, the Elders met with Richard this week (so did we, actually) and he came to Saturday night of Stake Conference. Oh, and he has a baptismal date! So exciting! He is the humblest, gentlest guy with such a terrible family situation. I am so happy for him to be able to find a family in the members of the Branch to take him in.
And I got to shake Elder Holland's hand yesterday, NBD. :) It was SO energizing to hear him speak. Saturday night, he shared the story of his inactive father being asked to teach Elder Holland's Primary class when he was 10 and it was SO powerful. The takeaway for me was that my missionary work has eternal significance. (And that's not limited to my time here- ANY work I do to help others live the gospel is included in "missionary work".) It was a needed wake-up call! Sometimes I feel like what I'm doing doesn't matter much and while it's true that the Lord could do this work without me and it's a privilege for me to be a part of it, it is also true that the things I do every day to bring souls to Christ (the big and the small, mundane things) change the course of eternity. I cannot take it lightly!
Okay, sorry I don't have more to tell about Elder Holland. I felt like I spent most of the time just listening and taking it in and I feel like I'm still pondering on what he said. I will have more to report after Friday's mission conference! (He made a comment in his Sunday talk about missionary work and then he was like, "Don't even get me started about missionary work. I go ballistic." I am excited out of my mind!!!) :)
Also, we're looking forward to doing baptisms at the temple on Saturday with Lydia and her mom Thellmah! And Caty might be able to join us! Say a little prayer that it all turns out.
Love you all so much! It is such a blessing to be here and to be growing so much. Thank you for all you've done to make that possible!
Much love,
Sister Wheeler Jr.
Please pray for:
Susannah Kulor
Aaron Washington
Kalyn Waite
Mychelle Briggs
Sherri and Chantel Newton
Maya Johnson
Bob Barr
Julie Brindamour (our new investigator who was a media referral who looked up "family-oriented churches" online. She is awesome!)
Richard (still working on the last name)
P.S. I call Elder Holland "The Bulldog" because I feel like he fits that so perfectly. He even started his talks very softly and lightly humorous, and then he threw down some serious doctrine and testimony out of nowhere. It was so awesome. :)
P.P.S. Funny moments of the past couple weeks: 1. We totally saw a drunk guy walk straight into a pole. Maybe not so Christ-like of me to laugh at him, but I was dying. 2. Sister Crane accidentally used my toothbrush on Thursday after I had just changed it to a new and differently colored one so we wouldn't get mixed up. SO FUNNY! We're already so unified. :)
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